Valid Valentine's Day Excuses

When I think of the month of February, the first thing that springs to mind is Valentine’s Day and all its splendor—Cupid, red roses, heart-shaped boxes of chocolate, Hallmark cards, and teddy bears.

You know all the soft, cuddly stuff that girls like.

When I was younger, I failed to understand why women made such a big fuss over Valentine’s Day.

For me, it was just another day on the calendar.

It wasn’t a holiday like Thanksgiving or Christmas. You didn’t get a day off to celebrate.

Besides, schools were still open on Valentine’s Day.

So, in my mind, it didn’t count.

For some people, Valentine’s Day does count, though.

It counted for my high school sweetheart—whose name I won’t disclose.

Back when we were dating, I remember she once threw a tantrum, because I didn’t buy her anything for Valentine’s Day.

Truth be told, I couldn’t understand why she was so upset.

I told her in advance I didn’t plan on buying any gifts, and I didn’t want any gifts, either. All I wanted, I told her, was her company.

That’s it.

Once I felt she understood, everything seemed fine -- that is, until February 14 rolled around, and all her friends bragged and boasted about the gifts their boyfriends bought them.

And you know how girls like to compare.

To make matters worse, she went to an all-girl school—which only exacerbated her jealousy toward her girlfriends, as well as her scorn toward me.

That night, instead of hanging out or having a stimulating conversation over the phone, I was forced to listen to her nag about not receiving a gift.

Yep.

That night, I was in the doghouse.

Should you also come up empty-handed this day, I've compiled a list of 10 valid excuses. Let me know if any of them work!

Whatever you do, just stay out of the doghouse.

10.I had bought you a Chris Brown CD, but after some thought, I realized it might send the wrong message.
9. Who needs gifts when we got each other?
8. Maybe we should see other people.
7. I convinced David Stern to hold the NBA All-Star weekend --in your honor!
6. I know it's Valentine's day, but remember, we're in a recession.
5. Ahem...allow me to sing you this song.
4. I think I left it at the store. I'll go check!
3. It should be here by now, but I heard they laid off the mailman. (This economy's ruthless.)
2. The dog ate your gift.
1. It's Valentine's Day?

Have a Happy Valentine's Day!